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The As When While Proof Reader

The ‘As’, ‘When’, and ‘While’ Proof Reader

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Check your documents for correct and incorrect uses of ‘as,’ ‘when,’ and ‘while’. ‘As,’ ‘when,’ and ‘while’ are appropriate when making comparisons but inappropriate when indicating simultaneity or a stimulus/response reversal. You may submit text of up to 45,000 characters for review.

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It’s OK to use as when comparing two things—for example, as sweet as chocolate or it was sweet as if it were chocolate. However, it’s not OK to use as to indicate simultaneity—for example: “Are you coming?” Ben asked as he opened the door.

According to Dwight Swain, you don’t want to put simultaneity on the page because the reader processes one action after another. If you use as in this way, the reader’s mind may trip and pull her out of the story. The same applies to when and while.

Even worse, as can sometimes indixate a stimulus-response reversal. For example: “He cried as he hit his finger with a hammer.” The hammer comes first, then the cry.

The “As, When, and While” Proofreader will scan for all uses of as, when, and while, assess their correct or incorrect use, and suggest improvements where needed.

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