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The As When While Proof Reader

The As When While Proof Reader

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Check your documents for correct and incorrect uses of ‘as,’ ‘when,’ and ‘while’. ‘As,’ ‘when,’ and ‘while’ are appropriate when making comparisons but inappropriate when indicating simultaneity or a stimulus/response reversal. You may submit text of up to 3,500 words for review.

Multi-language support: The Eight Crafts Backloader can provide feedback in multiple languages and will respond in the language of your submission (text and forms). For a list of supported languages, see this page.

The As When While Proof Reader will prompt a form in which you can paste your text. ECHOES stores your input only temporarily to compile the story outline. After it emails you a response, it will delete your input. ECHOES is not liable for the loss of your input. Always keep a record of the texts you upload to ECHOES.

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In fiction writing, simultaneity is a sin. According to Dwight Swain, you don’t want to put simultaneity on the page because the reader processes one action after another. If you use as in this way, the reader’s mind may trip and pull her out of the story. The same applies to when and while.

Use the As, When, and While Proofreader to scan for all uses of as, when, and while, assess their correct or incorrect use, and suggest improvements where needed.

It’s OK to use as when comparing two things—for example, as sweet as chocolate or it was so sweet as if it were chocolate. However, it’s not OK to use as to indicate simultaneity—for example: “Are you coming?” Ben asked as he opened the door.

In the worst case, as sometimes indicates a stimulus-response reversal. For example: “He cried as he hit his finger with a hammer.” The hammer comes first, then the cry.

Learn about Prose in the Amazon bestseller The Eight Crafts of Writing.

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